I have been having a conversation with myself
Reflecting on my emotions and honestly?
I do not know who I am or who I want to become
Torn between; a go out there and enjoy life vs
You need to be responsible
Who do I need to be responsible for?
What am I working hard for?
Future kids? What if I never have any?
I have lost everything already and I am unsure what
I am stressing myself over for.
If only my life would have been some what “normal”
Maybe I would have been in a different space
I am super ambitious but I doubt myself at the same time
I second judge myself and my decision
I am afraid of being left alone
Being clingy most of my life, its hard for me to let go
Most times I self sabotage, when a situation gets so good I ask why?
I start to look at loopholes and create mountains out of hills
A bottle or two of wine would ease my mind but then again
This can not be my source of life
I want to love carelessly
Not with one eye open and an anticipation for a heartbreak
I want to feel needed, to feel wanted
I do not know at what point I lied to myself that I wasn’t enough
You are Enough!
Sherry Mudaz 